So here we are – my first “proper” post on this little corner of the internet. I say proper because I already threw up that story I wrote, but this feels more like an actual introduction to whatever this blog is going to become.
I’m currently working on automating the whole publishing process so I don’t have to make two separate remote connections to the server every time I want to push changes. It’s one of those small inefficiencies that drives you mad when you’re trying to maintain any kind of writing momentum. For now, I’ll be pushing updates manually a few times a week, usually around 12pm whenever I remember to do it. And with that schedule comes absolutely no promise of a new post each time – sometimes it’ll just be me tinkering with the backend or fixing typos I missed.
Right now I’m sat here reflecting on a pretty mundane Saturday, probably one of the more average days I’ve had in a while. The rain didn’t help – there’s just something about it when it saturates you completely that makes everything else unbearable, like it seeps through your clothes and into your mood. Though I’ll admit, getting a bit wet with headphones on can be quite therapeutic when you can have a proper moment with yourself.
The day had its highlights though. I got to see one of, if not my favourite person, but it wasn’t quite the interaction I’d hoped for. One of my other plans fell through, leaving me with four hours to kill wandering wet streets before we could actually spend time together. When we finally did meet, I was still damp, my head hurt, and I had too many projects spinning in my mind to just stop and appreciate what should have been a really nice moment.
It wasn’t so much a planned conversation as just having time to enjoy each other’s company – something I usually love, just being there and letting everything drive itself. Usually it works beautifully, but today something felt dodgy. I have this thing where I can sense when something’s off with a person, and I’m usually right. I don’t know what specifically at the time, just this weird premonition that something’s about to go very wrong. I felt that today, though I’m certain it was me overthinking because I wasn’t feeling it at all. Still worries me though.
The thing is, I really hope I can finish that interaction properly sometime soon. She really is great, but life is busy – not so much for me. If someone asked, I could be anywhere in an hour (within reason). That’s because I don’t push myself very hard outside of my hobbies and “freelance work” – read: unemployment, but sometimes people pay me for odd repairs or 3D printing or modeling.
Speaking of money troubles, I’m currently broke because my beloved ThinkPad decided to die on me. Don’t know what happened exactly, but one day it just wouldn’t turn on. Honestly a shame – I genuinely loved that machine. But maybe this forced me to learn Sam Vimes’ “boots” theory of socioeconomic unfairness from Terry Pratchett’s Discworld. The idea is beautifully simple: being poor is expensive. A wealthy person can afford good boots that last for years, while a poor person can only afford cheap boots that need constant replacing. Over time, the poor person spends more than the rich person ever did. Same principle applies to laptops, I suppose. Instead of cycling through four different borderline e-waste machines in a year, maybe I should invest in one decent one that costs about the same.
Anyway, that’s where I’m at – wet, broke, contemplating the economics of durable goods, and hoping I didn’t mess up a moment with someone I care about. Not exactly the most inspiring start to a blog, but at least it’s honest.
More soon (probably).
73, Daniel